I am over in-laws!

jillian1527 · 06-27-2008, 09:36 AM

Maybe I am overreacting.. if I am please tell me so.. I know Dh thinks I am, but of coarse his mom can do no wrong. I don't know if I have gone into detail about the "miracle granddaughter" or not.. but Dh has a niece that was born at 36 weeks making her a preemie

( I roll my eyes because 36 weeks is when babies are classified as preemie, but the girl was born weighing in at 6lbs 3 oz and thrived fine, they use the preemie excuse for everything for this child) and everything gets handed to her from MIL... and no its not because she was a "preemie" but for who knows why, shes just the favorite.. Shes 10, right between Chloe and Rachel. Anyway....I could go on and on on just that alone but here is what I am pissed about. A week ago MIL&FIL asked my girls if they wanted to go to Tennessee with them to see their aunt, uncle and cousins. All cool. Both girls were pscyed to go.. Rachel said something about being home sick in passing, but she knew she would be fine b/c they all, including the niece, went camping for a week with out Dh or I around much, and this trip to TN is just for 3 nights. They were told SEVERAL TIMES to not mention it in front of Becky(The Niece) so she wont get hurt that shes not going.. which god forbid shes only went every other time they go and this is the first time my girls get to go.But still I can respect not saying anything because I know my girls get jealous that she goes.... So Dh and I leave Chloe, Rachel and Ty with MIL so we could do some shopping Wed. about 2 hrs in Chloe calls and says, Ty's asleep (he dont nap, MIL knows Dh dont let him nap) and Rachel is sick, Puke sick mommy.... We come home.. no sooner did I walk in and sit with Rach MIL says, Rach isn't sure if she wants to go now, shes afraid she will get home sick.. I need to know by tonight if shes going to go so if she dont Becky can go. I rolled my eyes, all I have heard about lately is Becky and scoop Rach up and go into the other room. I talked to both Rach and Chloe separate and both their stories match.. MIL started the day with asking Rach if shes sure she wont get home sick. Rach said yea I'll be ok.. later on.. MIL says.. Rachel if you get home sick or sick there is no way we will be able to take you home.. I need to know now if your going to be sick so I can call Becky and have her go in your place... both girls tell me Rachel said Oh ok.. again... MIL asks Rachel yet again.. this time Rachel says I dont know.. a few mins later Rachel says I want to go home I dont feel good.. My Rachel has a very nervous stomach.. after I talked to her when I got home and told her to do what she wanted she told me she didn't want to go. and then she feeling fine.. not sick anymore..
ok.. so in my mind... I feel MIL pressured Rachel so much it made her sick. even worse.. And DH thinks I am making it up... But I think MIL pushed Rach so much knowing that Rach wouldn't go so Becky could go... This happened Wed... I am still LIVID want to tear the woman to shreds pissed! I'm not going to talk to her about b/c I am wrong and shes right and why should I bother even wasting my breath to her because we have gone there before with Becky getting favored..
Thanks for listening..

Emma · 06-27-2008, 10:24 AM

Poor kid!! I would be super pissed! Don't you wonder how they ever raised their own kids??? Why do they think it's ok to belittle, tease, and break down a CHILD?

Rachel isn't stupid and she probably wonders what the trip is going to be like with your MIL if she treats her that way when they're home.
My Dh used to think the same thing as yours when it came to my MIL, until Thomas was born and she jumped into a marriage with a guy she barely knew. Before she showed her true colors to him, it was a constant battle between us and kids weren't involved then. I'm so sorry you're dealing with her along with Dh's lack of support in the matter.

jillian1527 · 06-27-2008, 10:38 AM

Thanks Emma. I am glad I am not the only one whos see it for what it seem to be to me..

Jessica · 06-27-2008, 11:09 AM

I think if I were in your situation, I wouldn't be able to keep my mouth shut! That makes me angry that your mil did this to her own g-child! Some words that I normally don't use are coming to mind.
I feel very bad for Rach. To be treated like this by someone that you love is painful. I hope she is okay.

I am sorry you are both having to deal with this. I honestly don't know what you should do. Saying something might make things worse. On the other hand you want to stand up for your child and let her know that this is not acceptable and it will not happen again.

Angela · 06-27-2008, 11:55 AM

I can't believe she pressured her so much that she made her sick! Poor kiddo... I would be upset too... I have a psycho MIL too but fortunatley my DH always takes my side because he knows she is psycho..

Lisa · 06-27-2008, 05:54 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jessica

I think if I were in your situation, I wouldn't be able to keep my mouth shut! That makes me angry that your mil did this to her own g-child! Some words that I normally don't use are coming to mind.
I feel very bad for Rach. To be treated like this by someone that you love is painful. I hope she is okay.

I am sorry you are both having to deal with this. I honestly don't know what you should do. Saying something might make things worse. On the other hand you want to stand up for your child and let her know that this is not acceptable and it will not happen again.

How awful. I feel for you because I too have a psycho MIL and my DH also believes all his mommy says...I have to agree with Jess on this....I have and will again stand up for my child against my MIL, if my DH likes it or not.

Koloe · 06-27-2008, 11:30 PM

I would be pretty irked with that kind of behavior. Not only is it mean to Rachel, it means they would not be willing to take just Chole on a trip if Rachel did back out at the last min. Why can't they spend time with just her? Why does the other granddaughter have to come along instead?