Leaving kids at home alone...

belinda · 04-05-2006, 03:01 PM

When do you think is an appropriate age? I assume 12. ????? Is that right? I'm trying to plan for the next little bean

, and if my calculations are right, my DSD will be 11 when the little one is born. Like, just turning 11 in June of next year. Do you think if she's a mature 11 that it will be ok? I will have neighbors check on her...but, was just trying to get your opinion.

Does anyone have a clue on if there is a law or anything? I certainly don't want to do the wrong thing...but, we cannot and will not be able to afford to have three children in daycare! Especially with an infant costing us $1000 a month!

Kris · 04-05-2006, 03:17 PM

Just my opinion, but no way. My niece is almost 13 and my sister is a very "open" type parent, but Casey still isn't left alone for ANY amount of time.

At this point, I would not even dream of leaving my 11 year old alone for even 15 minutes, much less any real length of time.

Again, that's just my opinion. I was a "latch key kid" from that age on....and I deeply resent my parents decision to assume that I was "grown up" enough to be alone all the time, and left to care for my younger sister. I really hope you find a better option.

Masonsmommy · 04-05-2006, 04:32 PM

I think she should be a little older, but I don't know her. Is she mature for her age? does she know not to answer the door and not to tell anyone that she'll be home alone?

Is there a nieghbor she could stay with after school instead?

Terri · 04-05-2006, 04:46 PM

As of this year we started letting Cody stay home alone on days when there's no school (he's almost 11). My mom lives on the next block over from us and doesn't leave for work until 2pm and two of our neighbors are retired and home during the day. We wouldn't however leave him home alone at night and we wouldn't leave both Cody & Carson home alone. IMO he's not ready for being responsibile for his brother -- AT ALL. But just him, he's fine.

Amanda05 · 04-05-2006, 05:06 PM

No way. I am a really over protective parent though so maybe my opinion shouldn't count. If you think she is mature enough at 11 then I suppose but I think having her take care of the baby too is to much responsibility. I belive in Canada anyway it is neglect if your child is left home alone until the age of 12.

DKGirl · 04-05-2006, 05:41 PM

I'm very protective over Will but I have left him alone for a short period of time in the afternoon. He's very mature for being only 9 1/2 years old. I've been gone for just about 2 hours max. I've called him several times on the cell phone to check on him and he's fine. Our next door neighbor is retired and I told her that he's there and our other neighbor is a SAHW and she's there too. He doesn't know that I tell them as he would say I'm treating him like a "baby" but it makes me feel better. I would not leave him alone with Hayden though. That's just too much for him. Being left alone all day, I wouldn't do that for Will at the moment. He's mature but he's also 9 1/2 years old.

I just worry about some perv watching our routine and then breaking in attacking him knowing that he was in the house alone each day.

belinda · 04-05-2006, 06:01 PM

Ok, that didn't come out right...let me clarify myself. I meant...have Katelynn (at the age of 11) stay at home alone after school (for 1 1/2 hours) until I get home BY HERSELF. The other two younger children (the new bean and Zachery, who will be age 7) will be in daycare all day and after school. So, Katelynn will only be alone by herself for 1 1/2 hours AFTER school. She will not be responsible for watching her siblings. Sorry girls! You must have thought I was nutso there or something. I should've been more clear. I would absolutely NEVER leave her at home alone with her younger siblings unless she was of a more appropriate age.

She is a very mature 9 now. It's really scary to say...
She's always been like that. She starting making her own bed at age 3 and would get VERY upset if I tried to help her...she would say (in a little toddler lisp), "I tan do it mythelf! I not a baby!" So, imagine that at the age of 9! I've got my hands full. She's already asked if she can be left at home while I run up to the store...but, I just don't feel quite comfortable YET to do that. I will have to see in the next 8-10 months how that goes. Possibly if I just run up to the store...but, who knows. DH and I will have to chat about that one.

Thanks for your input girls! I really appreciate your honesty...

Terri · 04-05-2006, 06:54 PM

Now that you clarified that, NOW it makes sense.

I think most of us were reading into it that you were questioning leaving her alone with the one-day-to-be baby. And we all agreed -- it's definitely too soon for that.

I think when it comes down to it, you'll know if she's ready or not. Sounds like maybe starting off slow and leaving her home while you run up to the store might be the way to go. Infact, I think that's what we started doing with Cody too.